Manx Football Blog 4: Ode to John Motson
Cliches, hand-eye coordination and a lovely beard - it must be this week’s Manx Football Blog
THE cliché ‘Form is temporary, class is permanent’ is a staple of commentary gantries in Great Britain and beyond.
On Saturday as I joined Manx Radio’s Tony Mepham and former island manager Kevin Manning in the Glen Road press box* I found myself uttering the staple of John Motson and co as St George’s netted five second-half goals to emphatically defeat early Canada Life Premier League pacesetters Laxey.
Geordies looked back to their best as they conjured up yet another impressive second 45 performance to blow away their opponents.
With Geordies facing Ramsey, Marown and Gymns in the coming weeks the others who harbour title aspirations will need to keep racking up the wins or risk falling behind Chris Bass Sr’s men.
There will be further twists to come as the 2012-13 campaign unfolds, but perhaps the race for Manx football’s top-flight crown isn’t quite as open as I suggested last week.
A poor man’s Grant Dawson
While noting down my match notes I found myself, albeit momentarily, the centre of attention at Glen Road not once but twice on Saturday. In previous editions of the blog I’ve mentioned my attempts to keep the games I’m covering’s tempo going by hoofing any stray balls that come in my direction back toward play. In the past that has caused You’ve Been Framed worthy moments at both Ballafletcher and Springfield Road as wet underfoot conditions and a over giddy kick combined to put me on my arsenal.
With this in mind, and with my pride if not backside still bruised as a result, over the last few months I’ve tried to temper my over-enthusiasm and retrieve any balls that come in my direction with a Dave Beasant-esque ‘safe’ pair of hands.
This new plan came unstuck at the weekend. As the first ball hurtled in my general direction between the dugouts at Glen Road I thought I’d put some pressure on Messrs Gerrard and Dawson, the two sides’ respective keepers, with a solid right hand to stop the ball from bouncing into the road.
The ‘solid right hand’ however did little more than hasten the smart looking Adidas match ball’s exit from the ground as I managed to divert the ball over the fence and into the adjacent road. This was met by several looks of disgust from the Laxey bench, one of whose number would now have to be dispatched to retrieve it.
With the first half nearing its conclusion, despite my best efforts, another stray ball knowlingly picked me out. This time it arched toward me, high out of the usually blue afternoon sky. I began to panic, but suddenly recalled a tip Neville Southall had imparted on Michael Owen’s Soccer Skills TV series. I stood firm ready to cradle the ball close to my chest – I was determined this one wasn’t going to get away from me. I braced myself for impact only to see the ball clip the notepad I was still stupidly holding sending both somersaulting away in the process. Fail.
Thankfully the collision with the stationary cupboard’s finest took most of the speed off the ball, preventing another trip down the road for one lucky Laxey substitute.
So if in the near future you see me anywhere near a match ball feel free to come and takeover proceedings. It’s probably best if you want to get home in time for tea.
Beard of the Season
An eventful trip to Laxey also spawned the first Beard of the Season nomination for 2012-13. Now this blog feature usually doesn’t get going till Movember, but Sam Theobald’s epic Tom Hanks in Castaway effort inset couldn’t be neglected.
Have you got or one of your team-mates got a better beard? Let us know send us a Tweet @manxfootyblog or email Andy.Dalrymple@newsiom.co.im and we’ll feature the best in the forthcoming weeks.
Didn’t they do well
Right before I go and practice my catching skills with Disco Dave, I want to pass on my congratulations to tour of Manx football’s finest graduates.
Former Castletown striker Danny Hattersley netted his third league goals of the season for Stockport County at Southport in the week, while former Corinthians player Alice Ashe got off the mark for new club Chelsea in the Stamford Bridge academy side’s 14-1 mauling of Barnet.
Blue Peter badges to both.
That’s it for this week’s drivel. We’re going all JCK Division Two on you this weekend so stay tuned to @manxfootyblog for Twitter updates from Braddan and Pulrose.
* I say press box – we leaned on a wall together.
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Weather for Isle of Man
Friday 24 May 2013
Temperature: 6 C to 14 C
Wind Speed: 26 mph
Wind direction: North
Temperature: 7 C to 13 C
Wind Speed: 10 mph
Wind direction: South west