On Mental Health Awareness Day, one mother from Douglas tells us about her experiences helping her daughter after she was bullied at school.

Pull yourself together. Man up. Get a grip. Just think positive. There are people worse off than you. You’re not going off to war!

Imagine hearing any of those phrases whilst feeling like you’re superglued to your bed, with terrifying thoughts churning round and round in your mind, like a washing machine on spin cycle, and your stomach twisted up in knots.

That’s the reality for some people struggling with their mental health.

Almost three years ago I found myself glibly throwing similar words at my then 13-year-old.

She’d fallen out with friends and had started to miss some school.

On the surface she seemed OK - a little volatile but her dad and I assumed she was just behaving like teenagers do.

Then we discovered she’d been bullied by one of her oldest friends but was desperately trying to hide her feelings and keep her friendship group together. Suddenly life became dramatically different.

Our previously enthusiastic, funny and talented girl retreated into herself. She refused to go to school, stopped going to clubs and activities that she enjoyed and even avoided family occasions.

She was in the grip of severe anxiety which over the next year developed into depression. Without pouring out the whole heart- breaking story, that talent show cliché became a reality - it’s been a rollercoaster, which thankfully is much more sedate now.

Whilst our daughter got the professional help that she needed, we turned to local charity Parent2Parent for support and - by talking to other parents in similar situations - we gradually found ways to try to understand what she was going through.

World Mental Health Day 2018 takes place on today (Wednesday, October 10).

This year’s event will focus on the difficulties faced by children and teenagers in our changing world. It’s hoped it will further the conversation around what young people need so they can grow up mentally healthy, resilient and able to find balance in their lives.

Bullying is just one of the reasons a child’s mental health may suffer.

Teenagers are especially at risk of anxiety and depression due to a constant need for approval on social media and many suffer from feelings of isolation and low self-esteem when it seems like everyone else online looks great, has lots of friends and lives an exciting life. Serious pressure to succeed academically and in other areas like sport or music certainly plays its part too, alongside tricky or changing family dynamics.

Big transitions in a young person’s life can also cause problems such as moving off the island to university, starting a first job or moving out of the family home.

And there’s no doubt that sexuality and relationships can have a massive impact on emotional wellbeing.

Some children and young people turn to self-harm as a way of coping with difficult feelings and tragically, suicide rates in children and young people remain high.

Clearly much needs to be done to alter the landscape for those growing up in these everchanging times.

Our young people do not live in a war zone or suffer extreme poverty and the challenges they face can be hard for those of us over 30 to comprehend. We were lucky enough to navigate our way through our teens without everything being posted online and for those embarrassing photos to be available on the internet forever, instead of consigned to the bin or the back of a drawer.

Life may not be as physically demanding as it was for our children’s great grandparents but there is no doubt this world is mentally challenging in a way we could never have imagined.

Manx Cancer Help at the Lisa Lowe Centre has offered emotional and psychological support to cancer patients and their families for many years.

And they’ve recognised that young people’s mental health is an area that also needs immediate attention.

They are building services with a team of experienced therapists that will help children and young people develop the skills they need to be mentally healthy. An announcement will be made in the coming months about a new initiative.

Lorcan O’Mahony is a well-known young professional and performer on the Isle of Man.

He says: ’I first came in to contact with the Lisa Lowe Centre through the work I was doing, raising awareness and removing the stigma around mental health.

’They were (and continue to be) so supportive. They really helped me with the tools I needed to back up what I was talking about publicly, and enabled me to push the people who I was speaking to in the right direction when they asked about seeking professional help.

’Personally, they have been of immeasurable help. They have assisted me in a pre-crisis setting, which may have helped to prevent or avoid anything bigger or more disruptive taking over. The ability to get that early prevention is something that is so key to a healthy mind, but something which is so difficult (often impossible) to get on the island under current mental health services. Their services, from inside and out, are invaluable.’

If you or a family member are facing a time of crisis do not wait - contact your GP, A&E or the crisis team on 642860.

Samaritans are available 24 hours a day on 116123. Parent2Parent can be contacted on 240999. The Lisa Lowe Centre can be contacted on 679544 during office hours and is not a crisis service.