My earliest memory as a native of Coventry is being taken to the newly-installed statue of Lady Godiva on horseback, which was the focal point for the city’s reconstruction after the Blitz.
With a certain much-loved institution in mind, a couple of pints of Manx ale have encouraged me to offer a little equine whimsy.
Lady Godiva needed a holiday
She wanted to meet some new folk
She was fed up of hanging round Coventry
Being stared at and rained on. No joke!
Birds didn’t care where they dropped one
Drunks would make filthy remarks
Kids come along for a giggle
She’d had quite enough of their larks
She gave a big sign and dismounted
Her horse just stayed put, wouldn’t shift
So she hitchhiked up the motorway
No shortage of blokes for a lift
She joined the lads on Crosby beach
The guardians of the shore
All stood there in their birthday suits
Like a show on Channel 4
Then she was struck by wanderlust
But didn’t have a plan
Went on board the nearest ferry
And ended up on Mann
Lady Godiva isn’t known
For being overdressed
And when she saw a horse and tram
She was like a soul possessed
She leapt astride the tram horse
To the driver’s great delight
Up and down the prom they went
All day and half the night
People flocked from far and wide
To enjoy this new sensation
But half a tramway couldn’t cope
With all the jubilation
The worthies look on in amazement
In Procrastination HQ
At last they decided to finish the line
Before an election was due
A few still wanted the tramway gone
Their reputation was zero
But Godiva took up residence
And became a local hero
William Arnett
Coventry
This letter was first published in the Isle of Man Examiner of June 13.
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