Every country has its challenges with sexual abuse. No country, no individual can afford to ignore it.

In Burundi the roles of men and women are deeply entrenched in culture, in community and the life of the country.

When you add in to this equation the consequences of war and civil unrest you have a situation where there is a large power imbalance, which corresponds with a high level of gender-based violence.

Christian Aid working with its partners has several projects in place to help change both hearts and minds within the community through education and working with the victims of gender-based violence.

We must not shy away from discussing such issues. By refusing to talk we give more power the continuation of abuse.

The first project I visited was on the outskirts of the capital, Bujumbura.

It is a women’s group, run out of a school, called the Get Back Your Dignity project.

This is a fairly new initiative for Christian Aid in Burundi, so the project is still finding its feet.

Its main focus is to provide medical care and psychosocial group support.

As I sat in the room and watched the women troop in, dignity was the word furthest from my mind.

These women looked broken, frightened, embarrassed. I cringed at their discomfort and that inspired me to give them the only gift I could. I told them my story.

As I spoke through my translator, and the women began to realise that they were not on their own, it was not just them, I could see the women’s shoulders relaxing, I could see their heads being held high and light return to their eyes.

Sometimes the greatest gift we can give is not the one we planned.

One of the ladies then chose to open up and shared her story.

Habouimana, 40, said: ’In December last year I was on my way to the city and on the way a man raped me.

There were other people just walking past. This was done at gunpoint. He told me he had been given money to kill me.

’But he said that he chose just to rape me instead. He came at me from behind when I was walking on the road. I was so frightened, I didn’t dare say anything as he also had a sword. He told me that he would not kill me but I was too frightened to do anything.

’I thought this was it and I started to pray. Maybe he thought I submitted. When it was over, two people came to my help and they took me to hospital.’

Her attacker, a man of about 27, was caught and is currently in custody.

But she said her husband is shocked and worried about STDs and HIV and while he still accepts her as his wife, he is not that interested in her anymore.

She said: ’His ’friends’ are teasing him that I have been unfaithful and cheated on him. I am frightened that he is going to leave me and then I will be struggling to look after the children.’

I travelled further inland on a bone-breaking track to a remote hillside hospital clinic and another of the Christian Aid gender violence programmes.

This programme was more established and the women I saw were much calmer and at ease with themselves.

Our discussion was an amazing emotional rollercoaster, with laughter, tears, hope, despair, but the one thing that struck me more than anything else was their absolute refusal to give up.

Joselyne Habouimana told me: ’When I was 10, I was harvesting sweet potatoes on my family’s land when it began to rain.

’A neighbour came to my family and asked if I could bring them some grilled maize. Looking back and having thought about this for many years, I now suspect witchcraft.

’When I got to the neighbour’s property with the maize, the man broke this in half and gave half to another man who I had never seen before. The other man said follow me and I did. I do not know why, it was like I had no control over my body and actions.

’He then repeatedly raped me and kept me locked inside the house for four years.’

When Joselyne was 14 her family found her and asked her to come home with them. But she was frightened and so stayed with her abductor as she considered herself to be his property.

She first got pregnant at 18 and went on to have three children with the man and was only freed when he was killed in the war.

Gloriose Nitereke, a widower with eight children, recalled being attacked by two boys while getting wood in the forest when she was growing up.

She told Louise that she was rescued by a man who took her to the father of the two boys but he just dismissed this as the boys playing.

Gloriose said: ’This was terrible as it made everything worse. The boys threatened my every time that they saw me. They used to hunt me out to torment me.’

Three months ago, she broke her wrist after falling over at work. She went straight to the hospital but was turned away without treatment as she could not afford to pay for the cast. Now she has a deformed wrist that has still not healed.

Maria Fitina was recently in the forest with her daughter collecting wood when they were approached by two men. They managed to run away but she fell on a tree stump and the branch punctured her side.

I came away from meeting these women with the feeling of sisterhood. These may from the other side of the world, but they are ones I am proud to know. I want them to know they are not on their own and that others care.

Christian Aid’s philosophy is to work through partners. Initiatives are led by those in need and those in the country, as they are best suited to understand the needs and requirements.

After long discussions with the country team, we devised two trial projects which I am hoping to fund from the island.

One is to make small beaded items to sell in the hotels and local markets as an immediate stop-gap measure.

The other is the more ambitious purchase of a sanitary towel machine.

Meanwhile, support from the Methodist Women in Britain has been part of the motivation to start a Manx Thursdays in Black initiative.

Let us all say no to violence. Let us make a stand.

The Methodist Women in Britain have produced a black ribbon to raise awareness of gender-based violence.

Show your solidarity by wearing black on a Thursday.

For more information, contact Louise on 474275 or at [email protected]

Christian Aid’s Louise Whitelegg has returned from a self-funded trip to Burundi. Here she takes a look at the sensitive subject of gender violence. Warning - this article contains some graphic accounts.